Friday, February 3, 2012

Dinner for one...

Tonight I had an odd experience.  Its one of those things that has the possibility to make you wonder "what if" for a day, a month, or even forever.

I went to pick up some take out Mexican food.  As I walked in a girl, well, I'm 36, so I guess it would be a woman, close to my age was walking in before me.  She held the door open for me, gave me a nice smile and, although she wasn't striking or glamorous, there was something about her that even at that point struck me.

I waited in line for my food, she asked for a table for one.  The hostess got 2 menus and asked "did you say one or two?".  "One" the woman said, "and thanks for rubbing it in" with a little bit of snark but enough of a smile to blunt it.

So she sat down at a table, took off her coat, and looked totally comfortable eating dinner out by herself.  I feel awkward when I take 15 minutes on my lunch hour to eat by myself.  But here was this woman who seemed perfectly at ease in a restaurant full of families and couples on dates to just sit there and enjoy her own company.

Now the part that gets me.  Part of me wanted to walk up and ask her if I she would mind if I joined her.  The bigger part of me reminded that part of me that I'm coming out of a three year relationship and a failed marriage that lasted a year.  Hell the papers haven't even been filed yet.

But now I can't help wonder...what if?